Shael started Kindergarten and continues to climb, play guitar & piano, and cultivate his unique culinary passions. Kanan is a native Portlander – rocking his mullet, losing himself in books, and embracing his free spirit (don’t worry – there is an airtag in his diaper). Brett, Bhumy, and Chloe grow wiser (i.e. have more white hair). We continue to travel (of note, New Zealand and Kauai), camp, hike, paddleboard, climb, and miss sleep.
A tradition for many, many years now. Shael is 5 so can hike 4 miles. How far can daddy hike? 42 miles, because he is 43! That is his algorithm.
Brown Bear, Brown Bear what do you see? I see a 1 year old looking at me.
Haley, Chris & Ollie, plus Auntie Stephanie, came to visit us! We showed them Pony Tail falls, ate at Tusk, and abandoned the first Shael/Ollie sleepover after a black eye and bloody nose.
Shael improved his skiing while Kanan was introduced to snow over Brett’s birthday weekend at Mt. Hood
Went to New Zealand for Dev and Hannah's beautiful island wedding, along with some Easter fun.
Filled with pasta making classes, a LEGO 5th birthday, northern lights, mother's and father's days, bike rides, camping, climbing, kayaking, paddleboarding, and more!
We visited Hawaii to celebrate Roshni’s 40th birthday
Graduations, news schools, big milestones, a quick trip to Bend, plus a visit from Nana and Halloween hijinks.
We closed out the year with more travels to Chicago, Chico, and Salt Lake City.
We lost my dad this year. Over the last few months and likely years, I have been reflecting a lot on his life. My dad’s hair turned completely gray in his early 40s. While I am frightened of this genetic reality, he wore like a badge of honor. When teaching me a “life lesson,” he would just point at his head and say. “What is this?” I would roll my eyes and say “white hair.” “No Bhumy beta, This is wisdom”. Now, I look at my own grays and hope that I will one day give Shael and Kanan unsolicited advice and say “what is this, beta?”
What follow are some of his precious ‘wisdoms’:
Be careful how much value you put into material goods. I remember him saying “Bhumy you don't NEED doc Martens. Beta, you WANT doc martens.” He fought the culture of consumption and understood early on something I continue to strive for – satisfaction is not derived from material goods. It is about finding meaning and deep purpose in this short time that we have in this life.
*Brett still drives his 1996 Toyota Tacoma. I have replaced SRI PREM (1999 rav4) with a 2019 model.
Things are not hard. You just have to learn. And learn he did. He learned to be a grandpa well before Shael and Kanan. My dad was bewildered by his granddog Chloe, but he understood that she had an atman and was part of our family. Like a responsible grandparent, he dropped her off and picked her up from doggie day care everyday when I was in fellowship. He would come home and tell my mom, “Tara, the stuff in this store. I think her clothes are more expensive than mine.” Chloe quickly learned how to wrap Ba and Dada around her paws. She devoured a rotli buffet everyday and got 6-10 walks per day because there was no way that Ba and Dada would let Chloe “do a jajroo inside the house.” When I went to pay the bill at the doggie daycare, they told me, your dad took care of it already. He would do this a lot. That was his love language was to quietly take care of things when he could. He would say “they don’t make you answer those security bakvas questions when you are giving them money. Oh Dads.
You can do anything you put your mind to. He taught me about determination and charting an often unconventional course. When I want to give up because this adventure is hard or the life of a surgeon is often exhausting, I would often hear his voice saying mind over matter, beta. Mind over matter.
Have an opinion and be willing to stand up for what you believe in. He loved to discuss and debate. He was passionate and thought about the world. I didn’t always agree with his opinions, but learned it is important to stand for something. Now, I am not shy about my opinions and have quite a few soap boxes. He showed me it was important to have a voice.
Love without reservation. Our time on this planet is short. My dad loved his family and friends deeply. He was proud of my mom and her religious devotion. He loved me to the moon and back and was unabashedly vocal about his support and pride. One day, he asked “do you know why I am proud of you? ” I responded with the typical-my career, my education, most importantly-my decision to provide him with grandchildren. He smiled and said “no beta, I am proud of you because you are a good person”. My dad was a good person who loved whole heartedly, showed kindness to the less fortunate, understood the value of integrity and honesty, and left a footprint on all our hearts.